Monthly Archives: July 2012

Updates, confessions and happy endings…

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I have so much to talk about in this blog post. You’d think I should be doing this every day or something. Well, that’s how it started out, but as we all know too well, LIFE just gets in the way and takes us from things we SHOULD be doing and distracts us to other, more useless things. However, I have not strayed, I have stayed my course and I’m feeling great about things!

To start, I want to update you on my progress. My hubby and I started playing tennis last week. We suck at it, but that’s good. I truly feel we get more of a workout because we are running around chasing after each other’s balls (that doesn’t sound right) instead of just standing in one general area volleying the ball back and forth. It has been great exercise and a welcome addition to my regime. This is something I can definitely keep up. Our only fight is the hot weather, but we have committed to at least 3 days a week to play for at least 45 minutes at a time. It’s a great workout, superior calorie burn and all around just fun!

Not to get too serious, because that’s just not me, but I have a confession (well, likely several, but only one I’m bringing up now). I have not been the greatest mother when it comes to the health of my daughters. I have 2 girls, ages 12 and 10. My oldest has type 2 diabetes as well, was just diagnosed last year at age 11. I hate this for her. I hate it. I can’t stress that enough. She is relatively good about doing what she is supposed to do, but for crying out loud, she’s 12 and she likes to eat. She is her mother’s daughter. She is overweight. Both of my daughters are overweight. According to the kids BMI charts, in fact, they are both… ugh, I despise this word… obese. There, I said it. Both of my daughters are obese. This makes me want to cry. And I do.

But, here’s the thing. When I say I haven’t been the greatest mother, what I mean by that is I haven’t been able to SHOW my kids, by example, the healthy things they should be doing and eating for a good part of their formative years. I have been lazy. I have been careless. I have not given them the attention, nor paid attention to all of the things I should have been paying attention to. What are they eating? How much are they eating? Are they getting enough activity? You know, it’s really difficult to instill that in your kids when all you want to do is lay around and do nothing but eat and watch TV. I have had the mindset that was instilled in me when I was young… their age, in fact, when I was crying to one of my parents about being so fat and overweight and was told, “Oh honey, don’t worry, it’s just baby fat. It will go away”. Well guess what? It DOESN’T JUST GO AWAY! Especially with this gene pool.

I have never forgotten those words, the way they were spoken to me, or the way I was laying face down in my bed, my pillow soaked with tears, thinking I was never going to be skinny like all my friends in school. As an adult, I can say, “What’s so great about being “skinny” anyway? Isn’t it just enough to be healthy?” YES, in fact, it is. I also know that kids are mean. I do not want my children to endure the name calling, the bullying, the relentless teasing that I had to endure all through elementary, junior high and high school. I want more for them. I want better for them, and I will give them better by showing them the right things to do. I will not put my kids on a diet, per se, but I am in control of this house and I can limit what garbage comes into it.

I am getting there. My children will get there, because after 12 years, I have finally awakened and can see that my neglectful behavior has done them no good at all. My oldest daughter has had some education on healthy eating, portion control and exercise, albeit great information, this came as a result of her diabetes diagnosis. We all tried to change everything to help her when she was first diagnosed and for awhile it worked, but guess who got lazy? Yep! I did. She did. We all did. She knows what she has to do and she’s getting better at it. She has a height advantage (5’5″), so her weight doesn’t show as much as it would on a shorter person… my youngest, for example. She is 10 years old and just at 5′ tall. She hasn’t hit that growth spurt yet, and believe it or not, for awhile there, I honestly had myself convinced that once she grew a few more inches, her weight would even out. Well, I’m not waiting for that. And I am proud to say, THE POINT I’VE BEEN WORKING UP TO THIS ENTIRE CONFESSION…, she has lost 13 pounds since May!!! I am SO very proud of both of my girls. More than you could ever imagine. They continue to amaze me every day, and even in spite of my bad behaviors, I’m so pleased that maybe some of the things I’ve tried to teach them, though I haven’t been the best at leading by example, some of those things just might be sinking in. 🙂

So on to happy endings. Yes, my daughter’s weight loss is a HUGE one. Additionally, I went for my diabetes check-up today and my A1c went from 7.1% in March to 6.1%!!! I am so happy I could just kick diabetes in the nuts!!

I know that scale victories are not everything. Matter of fact, they’re only ONE thing. I’m working on changing that mindset, and being able to accept all of the changes I’m making, and that my family is making. Small changes over time add up to huge life changes. I am learning to accept me for who I am. I can say that I do, and you can bet for certain that I KNOW who I am, I just don’t yet know what all I am capable of. But, I’m gonna stick around to find out.